Working Without a Net

For the past 2 days, I have not been recording my food.  I am working this program on faith - eat 5 packets, one measured lean & green with appropriate fats, drink water, move, sleep, done.  Nothing more, nothing less.  So what's my problem with this?

I am so used to tracking every bite, recording every meal, making lists and checking boxes that my OCD is sort of rebelling with this "new" approach.  I have done it, mind you.  I do still plan my meals for the week on a spreadsheet, but that is also for Dad's benefit.  I write on the calendar what we are having for dinner a week at a time.  The calendar is his Bible - he stands in front of it multiple times per day, checking something.  I'm never quite sure what he is checking, but he is checking.  It is sort of his talisman.  If I change my mind about what we are having, it throws him.

But the rest?  My mind says "How am I supposed to know if I am blowing it?  How do I keep myself organized? How do I know if the 15 carb meals and the broccoli are too much?" sort of like Dad does with the calendar.  And I try to quietly tell my mind that I don't have to know. All I have to do is eat 5 packets.  Any 5 packets. And the L&G.  After 2 days, my mind is beginning to accept this.  I am beginning to not feel like I am forgetting something. I am starting to relax into this, like I did at the beginning.

(Speaking of the beginning - I passed my Mediversary without noticing.  July 14, 2012 is when I started). 

Yesterday, I got a shipment of food.  That is an immediate trigger to sample everything in the box.  I did not.  I have some new things that I want to try, so I have scheduled them into my Food Plan for this week.  Of course, I only have 4 "slots" available to work with as I can't mess with the sacred ritual of sharing bites with my cat while in bed reading.  That is a Holy Rite, says She Who Must Be Obeyed. 

How is my weight doing, being an unapologetic daily weigher?  Oh, I'm still looking at the same number.  My body did tease me with another unprecedented low yesterday, but snatched it back today.  But I saw it!  And I'm claiming it.  And I will see it again. 

Here is to Day 3 of actual honesty, not Sue honesty.  Here is to Day 3 of following Medifast, not MediSue. Here is to Day 3 of keeping it real!